Palliate
1 :
|
to reduce the violence of (a disease); also : to ease (symptoms) without curing the underlying disease
|
Icy Hot palliates sore shoulders.
It also means to make a bunch of excuses.
I get a word of the day and found the perfect way to use it.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I've wasted all day. I slept ALL day. I got up early and had morning revival with a sister and then didn't have any motivation to do anything. I had a huge list. I kind of had an inkling to clean the yard, but had so much fear that I didn't know what to do with myself.
Fear. I haven't found what positive benefits fear provides yet. I'm still looking. Maybe fear helps us forget things, wiping our memories clean.
I've been spoiled by courage, lately. My fear resides like a floatie around me, buoying me up, but seriously demotivating. I'm so bored with my surroundings I can't see to change them. So today dealing with demotivation, boredom, and unreasonable fear. No courage to change my surroundings or myself. So instead of taking on any challenges, I turned tail and went back to bed.
I think this really has to do with disappointing someone close to me and because of that, they wouldn't or couldn't support me. Did get the bloodwork done, though, so that's encouraging.
Really, today though, I enjoyed God's rest. He is resting in me and I felt the past couple of days that my spirit was separating from my soul. I felt unemotional and detached. I missed the feeling that I could depend on myself to connect with others. I felt unstable and not attached to any foundation. So resting connected myself back to my spirit. We think that we don't need that "Day of Rest," but today is the day we need it more than ever.
My goal tomorrow is to find my courage. I can't seem to find it most days, but I know it's there, just waiting for me. I have to unlock it.
To keep my word. Because out of keeping your word comes all sorts of blessings.
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment